Saturday, August 13, 2011

2 steps forward, 2 steps back

I haven't written about potty training in a few days... here is an update!



So, Tuesday at camp went reallllly well: no accidents, he went on the potty every time, it was great.

Wednesday, home without Eddie for the whole day and Cal did okay, but not great at ALL... we were going to go for a walk with some friends and we were racing around trying to get ready to go.  He told me he had to go, and I didn't get to him fast enough and he had an accident.  We changed clothes and set off on our walk. 
Before we took off on the walk, I asked him if he needed to pee and he said no, but I really didn't want him to pee in my stroller, so I pulled his pants down and encouraged him to go outside (gotta love boys).  He did a little and said all done, so we loaded up the stroller and set off.  He did great on the walk, no accidents. 
We got back to my mom's house and went inside, where I immediately put him on the potty.  My friend and her kids were there too and I think Cal didn't want to miss out on the fun, so he peed a real little bit and then started saying all done all done all done.  I let him off the potty (my fault) and about 10 minutes later, he had an accident.  I changed his clothes once again, but wasn't going to get frustrated: he isn't even 2 yet...accidents are bound to happen. 
We got home and he started saying peepee potty over and over again so I ran him inside, but he had a real small amount already come out (tmi? sorry!), but the rest went in the potty. 
This is when Andy started getting really fussy (see next post...) and I was about spent.  We were on our 4th pair of underpants and I was exhausted....but determined to not let him back in a diaper... we had come this far...we are sticking with it!
Cal did not have any more accidents the rest of Wednesday-- he does really well when we are at home....even told us every time he had to go-- we didn't have to ask him once.
Thursday, Cal went to camp again-- super excited to go, once again.  Last time I took him, I took him into the bathroom before I left, but I didn't do that this time.... well, this time at pick up, Cal was wearing someone else's shorts (Sally, quit laughing....) and a diaper.  He had gone through the pair I sent him in, and the TWO backup pairs I sent as well.  They said every time they took him to the potty, he would pee, but only a small amount, and then he would get back with the group and would go in his pants about 10 minutes later.... kinda like what he did before. 
I think he doesn't want to miss out on fun times with his friends, so he pees just a little so he can hurry and get back to the group, but then really has to go, so he just goes in his pants.  He's the only one in his class that is using the potty, so I think he doesn't like being taken away from the group. 
So, I asked his teacher what we should do, and she said it's totally up to us.  She will support us either way.  I really appreciate that because I feel like he's so close, but he would be so far without her support...
After camp on Thursday, Cal did NOT want to nap.  I went in after hearing him say "peeeepeeeeeeee" over and over again to find my little man with his shirt almost all the way off (his arm was out the neck hole...and stuck), his shorts off and his diaper off.-- he was sticking his "part" through the slats of the crib, attempting to pee out of the crib.  Yes.  I am serious.  Nice, right?
Thursday afternoon, Cal did great with the training and told me every time he needed to pee.
Friday, I was reaching a breaking point.  I haven't had a break in a while and I think it's just catching up to me.  I think having Eddie gone, Andy sick, and dealing with the potty training, all the while Cal is learning to express himself by saying NOOOOO all the time... is really wearing me out.  I was pretty much at my wit's end by 9am.  We were having a play date a friend's house with a pool and I was looking forward to some one on one time with Cal (my mom graciously offered to keep Andy).  I think Cal is craving more attention from me, since it used to be just the two of us, and now Andy needs me so much and that is taking away from Cal....so I think he's been acting out to get more attention from me (and it makes me soooo upset).  Anyway.... I was losing my mind early on Friday and started second guessing the whole potty training thing.
We went to the pool play date and were swimming along, having a great time, when Cal said "peepee, Momma."  I said, do you need to peepee?  And he said okay! So I lifted him out of the pool, and he ran over to the woods/side yard, and started pulling his pants down!  I ran over to him and helped him and he peed a TON in their side yard!  I was pretty impressed he didn't just go right in the pool! That was a huge plus.
After the pool playdate, we were heading home, but I stopped by the club to pick up lunch.  I should have had him get out to pee while we were waiting,  but I didn't.... and he peed in his car seat on the way home.  ugh.  He didn't tell me he needed to go, and I didn't ask him.... that was my fault. 
Friday night, he did great-- no accidents, and today is Saturday, no accidents.  He has been really good about telling us today when he has to go. 
And this is total TMI, but we are waiting for #2 action... it's been a few days.... YIKES. 

SO, I really think this whole process is just that: a process.  There are going to be good days, and there are going to be bad, and we knew going into this, that he would not be accident free-- that's crazy to even think that.  I do second guess our efforts sometimes, but even now, when he's in a diaper, he tells us when he has to pee, and he holds it until we are at the potty.... that's a pretty big step.  We will see how camp goes on Tuesday.  I'm looking forward to returning the shorts... let's just say they weren't quite my style...... (Sally, shut up!).

Here's hoping to a dry rest of the weekend.... well, it's raining now, so a dry weekend for CAL at least :)

Mother's Intuition

Momma's just know when something isn't right with their little ones.  Mother's intuition is not something to be messed with...

Let me back up.  Eddie had to go out of town on business at 5am on Tuesday morning and was returning Wednesday afternoon/early evening.  I was going to be home alone with the boys, which is totally fine, not a big deal, I can handle it (but it sure makes me appreciate having him home--!).

Tuesday night, Andy slept a 9 hour stretch!  I was THRILLED!  I couldn't believe he went that long!  And once he woke up and ate, he was right back asleep again-- ahhhhh, it was awesome! 

On Wednesday afternoon, around 12, Andy got a little fussy, so I figured he was just tired and I put him down early for his nap.  Cal went soon there after... Andy woke up after about an hour and a half and ate and burped like normal, but then started the most pathetic cry ever.  I thought maybe he was still tired so I tried rocking him.... he was reallllllly upset at this point.  Tears were pouring down his sweet cheeks :(. 

Thinking it was a dirty diaper bothering him, I laid him down on the changing table where he let out the loudest shriek I have ever heard a kid make.  I picked him up, diaper-free, and held him and he was just so upset.  He was crying like he was in pain...and it was a different kind of pain than his tummy pain that he had previously. 

I carried him around for a while trying to get him calm and he would rotate whimpering, crying, and shrieking.  It was breaking my heart. 

After about an hour of him crying in pain, I called the advice nurse line at my pediatrician's office.  When the nurse called back, she talked to me like I was a mother about to walk off of a cliff.  This was our conversation:

Nurse: how long has he been crying?
Me: for about an hour and a half
Nurse: well, you know babies can't use words to communicate
Me: really? huh.
Nurse: so they have to really get their talking out through crying. It sounds like your baby is just frustrated right now and is trying to talk it all out.
Me: seriously?
Nurse: Yes, seriously-- babies sometimes cry for no reason.
----->I wanted to reach through the phone and smack her------
Me: yes, I know that, but he seems like he's in pain
Nurse: I bet he just needs to burp.  Have you tried burping him?
Me: yep. He had a great burp.
Nurse: Well, I bet you've been eating something that upset his tummy then.
Me: noooo, don't think so...
Nurse: well, you know babies can't talk, so they have to express themselves through crying... I bet he's just had a stressful day and wants to let you know about it.

UGH!

After going around and around about how some babies just need to express themselves through crying, I hung up the phone.  She made me feel like I was being an over-reactive mother. 

Andy was still diaper-less, and I had a feeling there might be a movement sometime soon, so I laid him down to diaper him and all hell broke loose.  He started shrieking over and over again and couldn't catch his breath in between shrieks. 

I called the appointment line, but of course, there were no available appointments that afternoon.  Soooo, I texted  my pediatrician (so bad, I know) and asked if she could fit us in.  I believe my exact words were: "Dr. K: Andy is in pain. Don't know why. Can you see us? Please? We love you."  I do love my pediatrician....

She wrote back to come on in.  Eddie pulled in the driveway right in the middle of this and bless his heart, he walked into quite a scene!  I filled him in and he said it was obvious that Andy was in pain, but he thought that maybe it was just gas.  I told him to call the nurse on the advice line and they could chat about gas and expressing themselves, but I was heading to the doctor.  Eddie agreed it was smart to take him in.

Poor little guy whimpered all the way to the office and I carried him in in my arms and he was the most pathetic thing you've ever seen. 

He weighed in at 14 pounds, 10 ounces and had a temperature of 100, which is no big deal at all.

When the doctor came in, she looked into his ears and he was none too thrilled about that one.  He screamed and shrieked and cried.  She asked how long he'd been like that and said, "he is in a great deal of pain right now..." I wanted to cry.  She told me she had concern about the draining in one ear.

She had me hold his arms down so she could look in his ears again, and then she went to get another doctor to look at them too..... the other doctor came in and took a look and they started mumbling back and forth to each other and I could only pick up bits and pieces over Andy's crying.  I heard them mention his soft spot on his head and I heard the word meningitis.   I was beside myself. She had the nurse come in and give him some Tylenol and put some numbing drops in his left ear.  

I picked him up and worked on calming him, and he finally just passed out in my arms.  When the screaming had stopped, the nurse came in and told me that her other 2 rooms of patients were all so worried about his since his screaming sounded so sad. :(

The doctor came back in to talk to me and check on Andy.  When she came in, he woke up and started cooing and laughing---!!!!!  The doctor said she was so happy to see that and that she was realllly worried about him when we brought him in.  Well, that about set me over the edge.  I asked her about meningitis and she said, "he was in so much pain like a child with meningitis, but he is totally fine." Then I asked her about the soft spot, and she said they were just commenting on how the soft spot was pulsating so much during his screams, but that I shouldn't worry about it. 

When all was said and done, Andy had an ear infection!  His first one-- on his 12 week birthday :) Go figure! I apologized to the doctor for being an over-reactive mother and she looked me in the eye and said "you don't mess with mother's instinct. You knew your baby was hurting and you did the right thing by bringing him in."  See?  That's why I love my doctor!

Oh, and when I told her that Andy slept for 9 hours the night before, she said she thought that was because he wasn't feeling well.  Ugh. haha....

sweet little nugget with his first ear infection...


 
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